I had everything planned out for NaNoWriMo–I was working on a story that’s been encircling my head for a couple years-the working title, Demonic Dispositions.

So, I knew what I was going to be working on, had made notes, organized things, and even attempted to plot–well, I at least thought about attempting to plot. But then something happened.

On Monday I was inspired to write a story about chronic illness, specifically the journey to a diagnosis, the main reason I had for wanting to write something like this was because I wanted to share it with my writing club. I wanted to tell them about me.

With this story idea banging around in my head–I decided to put it off till tomorrow, saying I could work on it later. Well, that did not work. It was weighing on me all night, and after lying awake for hours, I finally gave in and accepted fate. I wouldn’t be getting any sleep unless I started this story.

I didn’t expect anything much to happen  with it–I’ve tried writing stories about chronic illness, Madelung’s Deformity, surgery, and EDS countless friggen times. I never get through the first chapter. Writing about something so painfully close to me is so much harder than writing fantasy. Fantasy is truth wrapped in lies. But contemporary fiction has always seemed to pale in comparison for me–writing about the real life problems I face everyday never worked. I’d venture to guess it never worked because especially in the early years, writing was a sort of escape.

So I wrote–got about 600 words (I think-maybe more). I expected it to be terrible and boring, just like all the others, but I’m 4699 words in and I’m still writing–it has yet to bore me and the writing is decent–tolerable, though I continue to fight with myself in regards to editing. The past three days have consisted of me working on this story, tentatively entitled Salty Water.

So what’s the problem with that, you may ask?

Well, it’s simple. I see potential in this story and I feel more excited by this story than I do about the story I was planning on doing for NaNoWriMo. The problem is threefold: I shouldn’t be starting this other idea . I’ve already started this book–for NaNoWriMo you have to start it in November–it’s October. I don’t want to stop and wait for November to roll around.

I don’t want to abandon that other idea completely–just put it away for awhile. But, I won’t make myself stop writing Salty Water. I’ve got some great momentum going and I plan on keeping it that way.

I think what I can do to fix this situation is to continue working on the Salty Water AND if the story continues to go shockingly well, and I want to continue it for NaNoWriMo, I’ll just add the 50, 000 words to what I already have written. It’ll work–I’m just a bit disappointed that I won’t be working on that first idea I had. But there will be time for that later. I truly believe that sometimes we don’t have the ability or experiences to write some books–I think Demonic Dispositions is one of them. I feel like there’s something else I need to learn, to understand, before I’m able to write that book–I’m missing a few of the puzzle pieces at this moment, so I’ll just have to wait. In the meantime, I’ve pretty much got all the experience and knowledge I need to work on Salty Water.


Until next time, be kind, be lovely and write!


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